"Our personalities are truly a mix of nature & nurture. For example, two people can grow up in the same type of toxic, chaotic environment & person A can react to their past by becoming defensive, hypersensitive to rejection, aggressive & so unable to connect with others that they keep alienating those who could help them.
On the other hand, the emotional wounds experienced by person B can cause them to be empathetic, open-hearted, kind, gentle & so good at connecting with others that people are drawn to them & really want to help & support them.
The way that we process our childhood trauma is as important as the kind of trauma we experience. Ultimately, no matter what happened to us, we need to see that being able to get along with other people, not pushing away those who could be of assistance & creating a social support network are essential aspects of our healing.
If you find yourself inadvertently driving people away b/c you take offense too easily or because your unconscious, leaking hostility or paranoia give offense, it makes sense to work on your personality. Otherwise, you'll inadvertently recreate the experience of rejection & alienation of your childhood, which will cause you to remain hurt & angry & which will make it nearly impossible for you to break free of this pattern." - The Ruthless Compassion Institute
No comments:
Post a Comment